Improve Your Anger Using Mindfulness

It can be very frustrating to feel like your anger is out of control. As a Denver anger management counselor people often tell me their anger seems to go from 0 to 100mph in a matter of seconds.

There doesn’t seem to be any time to react. Anger feels almost automatic. When I hear people tell me this there are a couple of important things I share with them about their anger.

The good news is that anger is not an uncontrollable emotion. While it feels out of control at the moment, the reality is that you can change the way that anger impacts your life.

If you’ve had a similar experience with anger it’s possible that you’re missing some of the earlier warning signs. While it can feel like anger goes from 0 to 100, you probably need to improve your anger awareness.

Mindfulness Can Increase Awareness of Your Anger

One of the first things you learn in anger management is how to become more aware of the emotion of anger in your life. One great way to increase this awareness is through the use of mindfulness.

Mindfulness is a way to get more connected with yourself. It allows you to focus on how your emotions, body sensations, and thoughts are working. Studies have found that using methods similar to mindfulness such as meditation can have a big impact on your life.

Why does any of this matter to anger? As awareness of your anger increases, your ability to control your anger increases.

Understanding The Stages of Anger

Developing an awareness of your anger is important because anger functions at different levels or stages. While it might seem like your anger goes from 0 to 100 in a matter of seconds, that may not be accurate.

A helpful way to understand anger is thinking of it in stages. At the earlier stages of anger you might describe it as feeling annoyed or irritated. In the later stages of anger you might use words like rage or furious.

10. Violent

9. Vicious

8. Furious

7. Fuming

6. Worked Up

5. Mad

4. Provoked

3. Annoyed

2. Stirred

1. Alert

0. Calm

Once you understand that your anger goes through these different levels it becomes more clear that you rarely go from feeling calm to feeling furious in a matter of seconds.

Typically your anger builds and increases as you become more agitated. What’s often happening when your anger seems to fly out of control is that you’re unaware of your anger at the lower stages.

This is why it’s so important to become aware of the emotion of anger.

How To Increase Your Anger Awareness By Practicing Mindfulness

Mindfulness is a skill that can be developed. It’s simple to begin and can make a big impact in your life. Here’s a simple step by step guide:

To begin using mindfulness sit down in a comfortable position.

Place both your feet on the ground and your hands on your lap.

Begin by taking in a deep breath through your nose and slowly exhale through your mouth.

Start to focus on your body. See if you notice any particular body sensations.

Do you feel hot? Do you feel any tension in your body?

Begin at the top of your head and move through your body muscle by muscle.

Simply notice how each muscle feels. Is there any tension or pain? Become aware of what’s going on in your body.

Take a slow deep breath.

Once you have moved through your entire body, begin to focus your attention on your thoughts. What do you notice? Is your mind racing? What are you thinking about?

Your only job is to become aware of what’s happening in your mind. Your thoughts are not good or bad. You’re not trying to change anything at this moment.

Take another slow deep breath.

Now move your attention to anything your feel emotionally. Are you feeling sad or joyful? Do you notice any anxious feelings? Maybe you notice some subtle anger.

See if you notice anything that you weren’t aware of before you started this exercise.

You just completed your first mindfulness exercise! The more you practice this exercise the more your awareness will increase and your chances of handing your anger will get much better.

Good luck continuing your growth. If you would like to to continue developing your use of mindfulness contact a qualified mental health counselor in your area.